04 Aug HOW TO MAKE BROTHERS FRIENDS?

Case:

This family has two boys, 9-year-old Oleh and 7-year-old Maksym. Maksym is a calm and reserved boy, while Sasha, on the other hand, can be hot-tempered and emotional. When he doesn’t like something, he can throw things, fight and even hurt his brother. The parents tried to solve this problem in different ways: they introduced family rules, punished Sasha for his behavior by taking away his phone and going to the store, but nothing worked.

Advice from the project experts:

Individual time with each child. Spend 20 minutes a day with each child separately, without their brother. It can be a joint game, reading, conversation, or just a hug. This time will help children feel important and valuable to their mother and spend time alone with her.

Joint games and family traditions. Instead of playing competitive games that can increase sibling rivalry, organize joint activities where all family members cooperate and have fun. Family traditions, such as having dinners together, going to the movies, or reading bedtime stories, can also help strengthen the bond between children and parents.

Team building. Explain to children that they are a team that needs to support each other. Encourage them to work together on projects, games, or tasks. This will help them learn to cooperate and overcome difficulties together.

Analyze Oleg’s behavior. It is important to understand whether this behavior has always been present or has appeared recently. If it is an acquired style of behavior, try to find out why. Perhaps Oleg is having problems at school, feels lonely, or is jealous of his brother’s attention from his mother.

Allocation of resources and attention. Analyze whether resources and attention are distributed equally between the brothers. Perhaps one of them receives more toys, privileges, or time with their parents, which can provoke jealousy and conflict.

Consistency and clear rules. It is important to establish clear rules of behavior in the family and consistently follow them. If Oleh hits his brother, he should know that there will be consequences.

Parents’ feelings. It is important not to ignore your own emotions and feelings. If you feel exhausted, irritated, or powerless, seek help from a psychologist.

A reminder from the experts:

• Resolving family conflicts takes time, patience, and consistency.
• Don’t blame children for their behavior, try to understand the reasons and help them find constructive ways to solve problems.
• Communicate openly and honestly with your children, talking about your feelings and expectations.
• Don’t be afraid to seek help from a psychologist if you feel you can’t handle the situation on your own.