04 Aug WHAT TO DO IN A SITUATION OF CHILDHOOD DECEPTION?

Case:

A 6-year-old girl who goes to kindergarten makes up stories about her mother beating her and tells her godmother. This causes concern for the mother and godmother, because they do not understand the reason for this behavior. The mother is now raising her daughter alone because the father is at the front, trying to give her the best, fulfilling her various wishes. The girl also doesn’t want to learn a poem for graduation, and during a trip to another village, to her aunt’s house, she refuses to communicate with her mother, deleting Viber from her phone.

Advice from the project experts:

Reassure your mother. It is important that the mother does not react to her daughter’s behavior with anger or resentment, as this can only aggravate the situation. It is also worth noting that this behavior of children, namely fantasizing and unwillingness to communicate, is normal and therefore no cause for concern. Experts also advise mothers to seek help from a psychologist or psychotherapist, as there are signs of anxiety.

Play “Apples and Onions” at the end of each day. This game can help a child better understand his or her emotions and learn to express them, as well as talk through real events that happen. Ask your child to imagine that he or she has two baskets: one for “apples” (good events) and one for “onions” (bad events). Ask him to tell you what happened during the day and put the pictures in the baskets. This will help her become more aware of her emotions and learn to distinguish between positive and negative events. 

Understand the reasons for the behavior. Children can lie, fantasize, or distance themselves for a variety of reasons. Sometimes it can be a way to get attention because they lack love and support. In some cases, children may copy behaviors they see in movies or cartoons or from their parents.

A phone for children 6 years old. Psychologists do not recommend giving children a phone at such an early age, as it can negatively affect their emotional and psychological development. It is important to limit the time your child spends in front of the screen and control the content they view.

Personal boundaries. Deleting Viber and distancing themselves from their mother can be a way for a child to build their personal boundaries and protect themselves from emotional overload. It is important to understand and respect these boundaries, as this will help your child feel safer.

Protection from threats. Deceiving a child about being beaten can be a defense mechanism as a result of threats voiced by the mother. When a child hears that they are going to be beaten, they may talk about it as if it really happened.Psychological assistance. A psychologist can help the mother and child. The specialist will help the child cope with emotional difficulties and give the mother advice on how to better communicate with the child and help him or her.